Australians Invent Douche Bag

Webcomic 011 Douche Bag

We've grown blase about technology, some great Moore's Law of progress has dulled us to the incredibly awesome things that science is kicking out every single day. So we crack the human genome (FUCKING HELL!) and the public yawns. We have robots on Mars, right now, but I can't remember anyone ever bringing that up in the bar. Those videophones in sci-fi movies? Free calls for everyone with Skype.

It takes something ordinary to change, something not dismissed as science stuff for geeks (the Popular Girl shudders, 'eww! geeks'), before we're reminded that - oh yes - we live in the 21st century.

Some engineers in Australia have done just that. They've invented a new kind of shower head that puts an air bubble inside each droplet of water, cutting consumption by thirty percent.

I, for one, think we should call this new type of shower droplet the Douche Bag, because douche is the French word for shower and anything French is arguably more stylish than anything Australian, and Bag because they're tiny bags of water surrounding a pocket of air.

Since human use of water has such a major impact on the natural world an obvious sales pitch is to name it The Environmentalist Douche Bag Shower. Then you can have the guy in the TV ad deliver catchy lines like 'now I'm going to get naked and cover myself in douche bags' or 'I love how douche bags feel on my skin'.

Maybe for the American version we could get Mr T to do the spot 'Hey you jibba-jabba fool! Get out yo' seat and go get some douche bags to clean yo ass!', and everyone would blindly obey because the product is endorsed by Mr T.

Douche bags everywhere will change the world for the better. Hooray! Go Aussie Scientists!

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