New Humanist World Order

I'm studying Mind Performance Hacks by Ron Hale-Evans. Unlike more traditional brain hacking books (Brain hacking for Axe Murderers, The Zombie's Guide to Hacking Brains, Brain Hacking for Dummies) this one focuses on the needs of Mad Scientists, assuming an intelligent reader with limitless megalomania. It provides memory techniques for tasks such as quickly memorizing long strings of binary code - so you're never without your doomsday computer virus, even if the Justice League destroy your secret headquarters and all your storage media.

It provides many brilliant techniques for streamlining work processes, record keeping, brainstorming, note taking and keeping vast quantities of information in your head without forgetting any. The most interesting chapter so far covers Speedwords (Rapmotz), an auxiliary langue - similar purpose to Esperanto - that's very easy to learn and designed around simple, clear expression of ideas.

It's a lot like Newspeak in syntax and implementation, but where Newspeak was supposed to limit speakers ability to think or articulate unorthodox thoughts Speedwords focuses on the efficient processing and communication of ideas. I intend to be fluent in it in a week.

I may even make it the official language of the New Humanist World Order when I get around to taking over the world. In a similar vein, Unitarianism will be the official religion of the world government. By way of a want ad, I have already chosen my cabinet but there are many important positions to be filled. We will need, for instance, a Prelaetor of Microbiology and a Secretary for the Peoples Republic of Sark.

People sometimes ask me why I wish to take over the world, after all; dictatorships have a habit of sticky endings, often involving a lot of unpleasant shooting. Don't worry, I have most of the details worked out.

Created 2006-09-30 17:15:36 by 327 and filed under introspection